Countdown to Excrement

It’s only 5 days until America’s first illegitimate president gets inaugurated. It’s hard to believe it could actually come to this. I’m looking forward to the results of the joint effort of the New York Times and the Miami Herald in recounting the votes to see who was truly rightfully elected.

Of course, here’s what we can expect the right wing to say, if it turns out that Gore would have prevailed had the true vote count gone forward: “We have an electoral process and we followed it. A president is elected by that process, not by the New York Times.” Never mind that the process was subverted at every step of the way by an entrenched Republican machine in Florida, including the complete participation of the seemingly-inflappable Katherine Harris and the President-Select’s own brother. What makes it more heinous is that they’re completely unapologetic about it; they didn’t even make a passing attempt to avoid the appearance of evil. And most of America seems to be willing to go along with it. What’s wrong with this picture?

And while we’re on the subject of the inauguration, what’s the deal with Ricky Martin performing? As I see it, there are two possible scenarios. The first scenario is that he supports Bush and all that he stands for and is going ahead with his performance as an endorsement of that. The second scenario is that he is apathetic and apolitical and doesn’t have any convictions and therefore he doesn’t see anything wrong with performing.

(On some level, however, I am secretly looking forward to watching those Republicans try to groove to Ricky’s music. Are you old enough to recall Lee Atwater and Dubya’s father “gettin’ down” at daddy’s inauguration? I wish I had it on video. I’d keep it in my poison control kit for those times when first aid measures call for inducing vomiting.)

One last question about Laura Bush. Does She-Bang?